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Laura Hunt

Ask the Experts


Question: What is the appropriate age for the flower girl?

Answers from Marcia Coleman--Joyner
A Joyous Occasion

 The appropriate age for a flower girl is four (4) to nine (9) years of age.

Question: What is the role of a junior bridesmaid?

Answers from Marcia Coleman--Joyner
A Joyous Occasion

The Junior Bridesmaid, usually ten (10) to sixteen (16) years of age, has the same duties as those of your Bridesmaids: (1) to support you in any way that she can; (2) to stand at the Altar as one of your Attendants; (3) to join in and assist in all pre-wedding activities (such as showers); and (4) to help with Favors and personalized decorations, etc., if applicable. In conjunction with the Flower Girl, she may distribute favors at your reception. Her parents are responsible for her attire.

Question: Should a junior bridesmaid dress like the adult bridesmaids or more like a flower girl?

Answers from Marcia Coleman--Joyner
A Joyous Occasion

The Junior Bridesmaid's dress should be appropriate for her age. It need not be the same style as the adult bridesmaids, but is usually the same color. Typically, the flower girl is the only other person in the wedding party who wears white, unless white is the color scheme.

Question: I would like to know the most appropriate way to inform guests that I do not want children to attend the wedding and reception. I do, however, have a few cousins that are not infants or toddlers but pre-teens that I would like to attend. Can I invite them but not others?

Answer from Dee Merz
Everlasting Memories

Questions of whether or not to include children can be a sticky. Even well-mannered children grow restless at weddings. It's a long day and most of the time special meals need to be prepared to suit children..

I love children, but this topic comes up with every wedding. I advise brides and grooms to think about whether or not to include them, especially if they have doubts.

If at all possible, try to make it an adults' reception and that needs to be noted on the reception card so that guests know. "Adults reception immediately following the ceremony" is very nice and clear. It is very important to address the invitation to the parents.

If I think that children are coming, even though they have not been invited, I would have to address the situation so that I offered child care for the parents. That does take a lot of thought in having the space available, a room perhaps with a childcare sitter, TV, videos, books, crayons, and snacks.

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