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Laura Hunt

Romance & Money

Incorporating The Cost Of Gift Giving

Managing gift giving

Brandy in Tampa, Florida:
"In 2000 my fianc├ę graduated from college along with a large group of friends. I had graduated a year earlier and was already working in my career. It seems that since we got engaged and moved in together, all we do is go to his college friends’ weddings, showers, and house warming parties. Since we’re trying to budget for a wedding of our own next year, I find it hard to spend so much money on his friends’ gifts. Most of this comes out of my pocket because he has just started his job and is still at the low end of his income potential. How can I tell him without upsetting him that we need to reduce our spending on these gifts?"

Brandy it seems that you have a very legitimate complaint. This complaint provides you with a great opportunity to cultivate an atmosphere of openness and understanding in your relationship.

This is a good exercise for budgeting for your own wedding. Who will be paying for what? Have you formalized the budget yet? Maybe once he sees your own wedding budget in print, he won’t be so tempted to overspend on his friends’ gifts. If they are truly his friends, they know his situation and will understand.

Before the next occasion pops up, tell him that you would like help in figuring out what to give and how to pay for it.

It’s a great opportunity for conversations about budgeting and finances for the wedding and beyond.

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